47% Guy has 1000% of My Respect and Admiration

So, the hippy-fag-commie media has been abuzz the past couple of days with the news that the 47% guy has chosen to reveal himself. Yeah, I don’t blame it for being abuzz. I’m abuzz and agog and ahappy: Mitt Romney was brought low by a bartender–a hard-working member of the 47%.


So, the story is fairly extraordinary if you stop there. But the fact that this guy is so incredibly politically shrewd is what has stayed with me. He played this just right. He released the tape and let Romney’s words speak for themselves. The story never became a referendum on Scott Prouty, which is exactly what would have happened had he had a higher profile, or any profile at all. And as disappointed as I am that I have no idea whether he has granite countertops or not, I’m really really thankful he never put himself at the mercy of the wingnut media, which would have done its level best to make this man’s life a living hell.

I’m sure he’s getting death threats as I type this, and a part of me is wishing he’d never revealed himself. But, damn, since he has, I just wanna say “thanks.” Thanks for revealing Mitt Romney and his donors as the bubble-headed sociopaths they really are. Thank you for saving us from a Romney presidency. Because I really don’t think I could have afforded to participate in the mandated “Seersucker Suits and Polo Day”* activities. I don’t even know where to get a polo pony.

*For those smartass commenters who are bound to point out that–duh–I can get what I need at Seersucker and Polo Ponies Discount Emporium, let me just stop you: WE DON’T HAVE ANY IN RHODE ISLAND. So, bite me.