I Thought I Was Kidding

So, in my last post, I made a joke about “buttcream,” thinking I was being so funny and thinking there was no such thing.

Turns out I am not funny.

We are buying this today:

In other news, I’m not going to go through the motion of pretending to be sorry about the thing I’m about to say: I’m really hoping that, according to the Celebrity Death Rule of 3, that we will now get to experience the Sweaty Bloated Hysterical  Drunk Wingnut Death Rule of 3.  So, we’ve got Andy Breitbart. Anyway, I’m hoping that Rush is next. Any ideas, gentle, horrible readers, on whom should be the third?

Don’t bother concern trolling me. These men were/are horrible horrible horrible people who have coarsened the political discourse so that there really is no discourse anymore, nakedly hate and root for the downfall of a significant portion of their fellow citizens, and have–I’m just going to say it– probably caused actual deaths, with their rampant and unapologetic racism, misogyny and homophobia.

Please, bring two more to The Reaper, Universe.


21 thoughts on “I Thought I Was Kidding

  1. Look at that cute little face! 🙂
    Have fun putting butt cream on his chunky little bum. I wish it was me squeezing his butt cheeks!!


  2. I have never bought butt paste, I’m guessing the “pleasent scent” is a big bonus. In my younger days I used to but this. As I recall it was unscented.

      • Thanks. Now I want to thank you for being such a fine parent and taking such excellent care of your fine baby-cake (still tender and delicious). I’ve had the strange fortune of being a nanny for a child who was severely neglected by her mother during her infancy. Her mother wouldn’t let the father see the child until she was one years old, and then the mother started dropping the baby off at the father’s place because she couldn’t get the baby to stop crying.

        I have a hard time believing that that can be fixed later in childhood and it has made me understand just how tragic sociopathy is— how much a person has to be failed in order to not bond with the human race when their brains are ripe for the building of trust and empathy—how terrifying that must be for a helpless infant.

        It makes me very happy to see happy, healthy babies that are clearly being well taken care of, as well as being respected as the mysteries a person is. The formative years are truly formative and what is “formed” is what allows a person to be the social animal we are intended to be and to know love. (I can thank my paternal grandmother for that. She took care of me until I was three.)

        It’s not easy to be the primary care person for a needy and dependent person who doesn’t speak our language; but it’s a whole lot easier for a smart, attached, person of conscience to let love and intelligence work in a baby’s favor and to be worthy of trust.

        Your baby is blessed with you.

      • Well, this was an extraordinarily lovely post to find my comments section today. I mean, it actually heartening to me. I know that you know that tending to a small person can be boring and frustrating and tiring…and I know I am no perfect parent. Sometimes I feel worn down and tired and irritable. Sometimes I don’t instruct or play as much as I should…but I try to make evan feel serene and smothered with love. And I think he feels security…which is all I really want. So that you SEE that makes me feel like I’m maybe I’m doing ok. That means more than you can imagine.

    • I’m dumb. How did I not know about all these ass-related products? Hell, I forgot about hemorrhoid cream.

      YES, THAT’S RIGHT, you come to my blog and I talk about hemorrhoids!

  3. “I have never wished a man dead, but I’ve read many an obituary with great pleasure.”
    -Mark Twain

    Don’t let him die yet! I’ve spent years trying to explain to my politically ignorant friends that the Republican Party in general, & the Conservative Movement in particular, is fueled wholly by the ugliest parts of the human psychological underbelly. I usually hear some version of “Well, I don’t agree with everything they say, but they have a good point about (insert Fox News talking point here)”. This is bolstered by false economic data, wacky historical revisions, and straw-man versions of Evil Libruls Who Hate America taken directly, if unconsciously, from people like Lush Rimjob.
    Most (employed) people don’t spend the time I do worrying about the harmful social impact of Rimjob’s existence; even those of us that do have to respect the 1st amendment. The only way that the cultural cancer this man channels will ever get excised is through widespread disgust on the part of the vast majority of Americans who, whatever their political leanings may be, do not like loudmouth bully assholes.
    Every time he opens his mouth now, he’s bringing that disgust closer to critical mass. The fact that he’s taking the GOP down with him is icing on the cake.

    ‘Course, that’s just my opinion. What Wileywitch said is Truth. Any mom who’s taking the time to teach Chess is OK in my book 🙂

    • As painful as Rush’s comments were to hear…because they’re just so damn ugly and I know there are millions out there like him…were also a relief to me. Because every time Rush spouts off, it forces the Repugs to defend or defy him. It’s seriously, like, ambrosia-delicious.

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