I Accept this Award on Behalf of all the Oppressed Monkey Butlers of the World

Our own lovely Laura recently received a little award, and was kind enough to pass one along to me. Since there’s almost nothing I like better than talking about myself, except perhaps having people tell me how INCREDIBLY GOOD-LOOKING I am, I accept this award!

Here are the RULES for the Versatile Blogger Award-

1. Add the award to your blog.
2. Thank the blogger who gave it to you.
3. Mention seven random things about yourself. (see below)
4. List the rules.
5. Award to 15 bloggers.
6. Inform each of those 15 by leaving a comment on their blog.

But, dude, I don’t need your FASCIST RULES. Plus, I can’t imagine the folks I’d award this to taking part. So basically I’m just going to talk about myself, and aren’t you all lucky?!

  • I was a skeptic and atheist from a very young age. I remember thinking things like Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy were incredibly silly. And god? Don’t get me started. I always felt different from a lot of people, but not in a bad way. In other words, it’s not something I agonized over. I’ve always been stunningly up front about my disbelief. I find that if you’re cheerfully but defiantly honest about what you believe, no one will give you shit. And no one ever has. It’s kind of remarkable if you think about it.
  • Speaking of being honest about who you are, I was kinda straight-edge in high school.  I did not drink or do do drugs, had little interest in drinking or doing drugs and refused to be pressured into trying them. I also refused to be pressured into having sex, and refused to be or do anything I didn’t wanna be or do. This never made me popular and I was ok with that. In the last two years of high school, I pretty much abandoned high school bullshit and hung almost exclusively with a small college crowd.
  • I loathed the clique-iness and shallowness of high school and did not attend my graduation. I’ve been politely giving the world the middle finger since I was pretty young.
  • I love this new Kelly Clarkson song (It’s soooooooooooooooo uncool–AND I’M  PROUD OF IT!) and can hit every note in it, which stuns me.
  • I like Taco Bell (!!!!!) occasionally. This is NOT something I’m proud of.  Yo quiero intestinal distress!
  • I like awards and medals and have won many over the years. Let me tell you them:
  1. Most Ashamed Taco Bell Eater
  2. Best Holey Sock Collection Tri-State Area
  3. Most Creative Use of Unwashed Hair in Bun or Ponytail
  4. Most Adorable Misanthropist (39 years running!!!)
  5. Exemplary Pegasus Grooming
  6. Extraordinary Valor Shown in the Great Diaper-Change War of 2012
  7. MOST INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE Author at Super Karate Monkey Death Car
  8. Most Gracious Award and/or Medal Award Recipient
  9. Best in Show

So, YEAH!, I’ll put another on the mantle. BECAUSE I AM AWESOME.

Also, the children are our future…and let’s make with the WORLD PEACE, already!


13 thoughts on “I Accept this Award on Behalf of all the Oppressed Monkey Butlers of the World

  1. So well decorated! You sound a lot like an artist. I’m glad you to didn’t have to struggle a lot with your differences and with people who have trouble with differences.

    I too, hated high school and didn’t care much for teenagers when I was a teenager, so I hung out with older people. Adults who have had their asses kicked by life a time or two and admit it are easier and more instructive people to be with than teenagers who think life is going to turn out however they will it.

  2. I always hung out with older people as well. I think that for me, it had a lot to do with having much older siblings. I was just always around adults.
    Thanks for participating! It was fun getting to know you a bit better. 🙂


  3. Monkey Butlers are NOT OPPRESSED and they don’t want to join your liberal-fascist unions! They don’t even want to know about them!

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