Chunky Neckbeard Emporium Founder Thinks Calling Women Sluts Is Funny and Necessary

Remind me to quit clicking links in the Gaybortion-o-sphere; it only gets me into trouble.

Speaking of trouble, ladies, don’t get into it. Don’t get into trouble. You know, “trouble.” In other words, keep your fucking legs closed, slut. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! Get it? It’s a joke, only it’s not, but it is, but it’s a good joke because the underlying message is good and TRUE, dammit. Why can’t you sluts just keep your legs closed?!

Mark Steyn likes the Aspirin joke because it’s not a joke to him. And if you find it deeply misogynistic, too bad for you, slut.

These are lines about societal views of sex, and, while they’re certainly “antiquated” (in Michael’s word), the response to Mr Friess suggests an attempt to criminalize not the gag so much as the attitude underlying it.

Criminalize it? Oh, if only, Neckenbeardensteyn. Yes, obviously a lot of slutty people–for the purposes of this entry we’ll call them “women”–find it goddamn offensive. Because what it implies is that if women have consequence-free sex, they are sluts, which in Chunkyneckbeardshire is the worst thing you can be. Are you a liar? S’okay. Are you a hypocrite? Grand! Are you a chunkyneckbearded  bully? Throw this man a ticker-tape parade!

Where the slutty Hobbits at?!

A woman Neckenbeardensteyn wishes all the sluts women of the world emulate? The one who said this:

All that Swinging Sixties. It didn’t do anyone any good, did it?

‘Easy sex and the Pill. Marriages were ruined. I never did approve. I never really enjoyed the sex.’

I think it’s the idea that some woman somewhere is enjoying sex that really shrivels the wingnut-o-sphere’s already shriveled Cheetos dust-covered penises. Women are not entitled to sexual fulfillment, full-stop. I’d like to comment on what residents of Chunkyneckbeardshire think about male sexual fulfillment. Oddly, they never discuss it. It’s almost as if a man’s sexual health and fulfillment are not subjects are that up for debate. I wonder why, especially since so many of these cretins seem to think men are little more than primeval rape-machines.

I demand that we start imploring the residents of Rapingshire to…oh, I don’t know…”tuck it in” or “slap it down” or “hack it off with an ax, if it gets too uppity.” You know, UPppity. Come on, THAT’S FUNNY.

Or, we could all move to Actlikeanadultown and recognize that people are sexual and provide them with the proper reproductive care.



22 thoughts on “Chunky Neckbeard Emporium Founder Thinks Calling Women Sluts Is Funny and Necessary

  1. I’ve been an avowed feminist since the sixth grade. That was ’72. If you had asked me then if this kind of talk would be happening in 2012 I would have had no idea what you were talking about. If you had asked me in high school when it was common to hear girls in the bathroom say, “Whores at least get paid for it, sluts just give it away.” I would have bet on that being worn out by now.

    Why would a woman embrace a concept that puts a price on her that will drop like a car that’s just been sold and driven off the lot?

  2. I’d like to comment on what residents of Chunkyneckbeardshire think about male sexual fulfillment. Oddly, they never discuss it.

    They usually discuss it in hushed, furtive whispers in the men’s restrooms of airports and highway rest-stops.

  3. I read Steyn’s America Alone. What I found fascinating about it was how in his description of how terrible the Muslim Europa would be, he says, “I don’t think we should lose this.” but then spends the rest of the book snickering and running down those stinky Euros and their socialist policies. He takes great pride in glee at how stupid and wrongheaded he percieves them to be.

    Eventually I began to wonder why he found the whole Muslimtopia thing worrisome. It was like his nature is so bullying he can’t actually figure out what’s worth “saving” without completely tearing it down.

    Also, he responded to Johann Hari’s review of the hardcover edition, calling it the “best lefty takedown” by pointing out two things: Hari is gay, and some Muslims hate gays. That’s it. Didn’t answer a single point Hari brought up in his review.

    • YOu read a whole book by that asshole? Good god. ARe you all right? I can’t even…wow.

      And his respose to the reviewer sounds so…Steynesque. It’s such a bummer the man thinks he’s funny. It makes me want to troll him out of existence.

      • He’s actually got a pretty decent writing style, much better than incoherent zigzaggers like Ann Coulter. He’s just so astonishingly mean and hateful that his points become indistinguishable from his need to SCORE points. I also think that, if you actually ran up to him in person, he’d be just as nasty as he comes off in print.

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