Whiskey Fire Is Burning…MY HEART!!!!

OK, so I’m trying to post a remarkably witty response at Whiskey Fire. But, oddly, many of the times I try to comment there, the “Post” and “Preview” buttons are inactive. So I’m fiddling, fiddling, reloading, signing in, signing out…and I notice THIS:

The link of my dreams! (that don’t center around Pokemon hentai)

So, I’m like, “Fuck this shit, I’m going to see Zap Rowsdower!!!!!” So I click and I get…this:

Oh, the whiskey fire burns, all right. It burns HARD. It raises your hope. It takes your hope for an unforgettable date: Mario Battali cooks, the conversation is as sparkling as the champagne. So your hope goes to Whiskey Fire’s penthouse apartment, gazes at a starry sky that seems to sparkle just a little more that night, then Whiskey Fire makes sweet, passionate love to your hope ’til the day breaks. The next morning, it turns out Whiskey Fire roofied your hope, has a hairy back and is on probation for molesting neighborhood dogs. WHY YOU GOTTA DO ME THIS WAY, WHISKEY FIRE?!!!

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42 thoughts on “Whiskey Fire Is Burning…MY HEART!!!!

  1. "It's on Netflix streaming, VS. dudeskull will love it, they mock Canada."Being Canadian, I do not approve of this type of mockery!Not one bit!!!*angry eyes*Just kidding… :D(Hugs))Laura

  2. Gods of the Horde "Rowdowser?" So, over at Whiskey Fire the comment troll wouldn't let you comment, and you got some KIA ad instead? That sounds sucky. Anyone who wants to see a really awful movie—one worthy of Mystery Science Whatever— see "The Rising Dead." The only explanation I could come up with to explain it was that someone broke into a car, stole a video camera and enough money to buy malt liquor and crack for all their friends for a weekend of movie making.

  3. ooooo, its a goody, a teen crime caper comedy starring Tommy Kirk and a Sid Caesar knockoff, with a splendid cameo by Little Richard, looking so stoned that the crew famously says "I think there is a promising young singer all hopped up on goofballs."

  4. Well Joel, this week's movie is called Catalina Caper and it is… delightful. It's a veritable feel-good movie, a light-hearted romp, a triumph of the human spirit! Thank you, Tommy Kirk, for making us laugh about love… again. And it's got a great theme song. You're gonna love it! Never ever, ever steal anything wet! Never steal anything wet! Eeeyukaaeeee!

  5. You're Thread Bear? How the hell did I not know this? Well, no wonder I always liked your posts. And to think all this time, I could have been annoying you the way I annoy all my old friends there.

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