Tiny-Nosed 12-Year-Old Ben Shapiro Wears Yamulke, Gets Pwned by Soft-Spoken Pakistani Man with Posh British Accent

LibertyWhatever thinks Bashir was humiliated. Hmmm. Howso, LibertyPerson?

Ben Shapiro has a very bizarre, off-putting baby face.

How about a baby face that is adorbs and not off-putting? Dudeskull does a lot of self-soothing with his little mitts. They are always up by his face, almost like he is posing. One time he even made jazz hands. Swear to gawd.  I like to create little scenarios for his poses, like:

Gettin’ the Vapahs
and
Rough Day at the Office

Go ahead, bask in his cuteness. Make up a scenario. It’s OK.

Also, can anyone explain to me the “American Idol is conservative” meme? I don’t watch the show, but even if I did, I’m not sure I’d understand where that line of thinking came from. Also, reality television is conservative? I’m asking in a totally not-snarky way: What does that mean?

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117 thoughts on “Tiny-Nosed 12-Year-Old Ben Shapiro Wears Yamulke, Gets Pwned by Soft-Spoken Pakistani Man with Posh British Accent

  1. Not sure I like the skin tone of the hand holding that baby in the last photo. Looks sort of greenish – do zombies do farming? Like, raising small (orphaned, naturally) children until they're a good size for a decent meal? I'm curious.On the other hand, it could just be that the white balance on yer camera is off. Or you're jaundiced. God, I hate simple explanations.

  2. I saw Tiny Ben and get thumped and lamesplain away Fox spruiking of the Palinator.Jebus he's a whiny little toad.Dudeskull is healthy looking slayerette, innee?In the top photo he looks like he saying "Oh God! she's mentioned Paul Revere"I got Smut's capcha:sicke. Madam we antipodeans are not all the same.

  3. The third pic looks JUST like a dood who beat me black and blue in a bar in Jackson Hole. That story actually has a happy ending though.The actual answer to your burning question is that reality teevee shows, in general, are neither liberal nor conservative, any more than operas or baseball games or Space Ghost or "Greatest Tank Battles".This is an artificial construct, created by people who seem to have an inherent NEED to turn everything into some sort of tribal competition (see about three quarters of the programming on Food Network). So they develop some sort of tortured interpretation of this event or that spectacle or this other bit of entertainment and explain how it supports and validates their ideological worldview.The problem with these interpretations is that they are completely arbitrary, simultaneously impossible to prove or refute. In other words, another case of right-wing faith-based, non-falsifiable, totally imaginary and wholly batshit insane data they can trot out to 'prove' that their deeply irrational and utterly absurd political philosophy simply MUST be correct because look at all the real world examples of unequivocal support.My advice would be don't get caught up in an argument that begins from such an embarrassingly idiotic premise, for you can't 'disprove' the cartoon that's playing in the fevered imagination of these wackadoodles, but rather walk away shaking your head and hope they do something stupid and erratic enough that you can hit them several times with something heavy…

  4. Or you're jaundiced. Hey, I haven't seen a lot of sun lately. She likes (whisper) TOP 40 MUSICYou can't prove a thing. Someone hacked my Blogger account and said that. Also you're an insufferable snobby zombie.

  5. (see about three quarters of the programming on Food Network)Ha! You noticed that too? I actually like cooking competitions, but sometimes feel like they purposely suck the joy out of one of life's sensual pleasures. I don't get it.hope they do something stupid and erratic enough that you can hit them several times with something heavy… Totally. But I'm still curious as to what the thinking is behind this. Is it because they see reality shows as merit-based somehow?

  6. How soon do human babies' eyes open? I remember it takes a few days for kittens, but aren't you worried yet?"Reality" shows (really just semi-unscripted) offer cretins wallowing in their sad human emotions, acting w/o thought or rationality, & being constantly offended by & lashing out at one or another of their equally disturbed & trashy friends.Sounds conservative to me.

  7. I have indeed. Though I've abstained the past couple nights. I hope I have and opportunity to get good and lushy sometime soon. I mean y'all are already funny as hell sober. I need to experience my readers all messed up.

  8. Sadly, I can't even claim smoking and blogging like a crazed ferret.The Poop, on the other hand (ok, I KNOW that's not where it comes from but we're tying to raise the discourse from preteen to adolescent, you copy?)I totally have covered.Which is kind of in the gloating modality, because, apparently, men of my cohort in general often have trouble pushing out a good log.

  9. I actually like cooking competitions, but sometimes feel like they purposely suck the joy out of one of life's sensual pleasures.When the inevitable competitive-fucking programs appear on reality TV, I hope they reference Empress Messalina somewhere in the title.

  10. Which is kind of in the gloating modality, because, apparently, men of my cohort in general often have trouble pushing out a good log. Yeah, us ladies aren't great at it either.When the inevitable competitive-fucking programs appear on reality TV, I hope they reference Empress Messalina somewhere in the title.The guy who may or may not have been hitting on me at the auto servicing place claimed they actually had those when he was living in Germany.

  11. Bashir should be humiliated. He admits to reading Shapiro's book.I can not believe how incredibly stupid Ben is. The contortions one must go through in order to shoehorn the world into this GIANT CONSPIRACY AGAINST CONSERVATISM is ridiculous.Jump ahead to 3:35 for the Children's Show discussion.Children's shows are biased in a slightly moar subtle way. They're really biased towards a self-esteem ethos.His problem is with, get this, self-esteem, unearned.WTF. WHAT. THE. FUCK.Nevar have kids Virgin Ben. Nevar.Self-esteem, unearned. Sweet fucking Invisible Pink Unicorn – is there a moar hideously awful collection of words that you could give to children?I suppose next up is this leftsist fixation on human rights unearned.I'd like to give Virgin Ben a cock punch, unearned – but d00d has so fucking many of them due, I'd probably have to design some sort of cock-punching machine to work through his cock-punch account.

  12. Self-esteem, unearned. Fuck.Yeah. I mean, I actually do think we're raising a generation of shallow narcissists…but when it comes to small children, helping to boost self-esteem is probably really healthy impulse. I always had horrible self-esteem, and that kind of thing that can have incredibly long-lasting consequences, most of them not good. Plus, I think the idea of unearned self-esteem is just a laugh riot when you think of the wingnut welfare crowd complaining about it. Damn, who's getting unearned self-esteem…and money?

  13. Yeah. I mean, I actually do think we're raising a generation of shallow narcissists…so should I just get off your lawn then?wow. Usually it takes longer than two days for someone from becoming a new parent and "these kids today, are going to hell".

  14. Shallow narcissism or not, self-esteem is a basic human need and shitbags like Ben who want to deny it to children should be cock punched by a bear.The guy is against kids feeling good about themselves. He thinks that it's a communist plot or something. Fuck you Ben and your fucked-up idiotology. I hope someone punches you in the cock.

  15. I totally agree. Plus, I don't know what these guys want from children's shows. "God hate fags" just doesn't sound very wholeseome to me. Also, the cock-punching bear made me laugh.

  16. Well, looking back, my self-esteem was always unjustly high while my ambition and discipline hovered just below zero. Now I readily recognize that an unreasonably and unrealistically high belief in my own abilities and capabilities is the only rational explanation for my survival on a number of occasions, it would also be dishonest if I didn't recognize that this characteristic more often led to my making poor decisions, treating other people badly and generally missing a lot of what the community had to offer.On net, while DKW is right I think (I've never come close to parenting, so my opinions on the topic, and even my entitlement to have opinions on the topic are to be viewed with extreme scepticism) that it is best to imbue children with a strong sense of self esteem and self worth, it is probably ALSO worthwhile to help that same child develop a healthy realistic understanding of both human and his or her individual limitations.The fact that in spite of my vastly excessive self-esteem I've always recognized that I am inherently and perhaps congenitally unable to hit a baseball or drive an automobile well perhaps contributed the tiny bit of balance that allowed me to avoid summary expulsion from my community.

  17. First, I am chagrinned that mikey feels the need to qualify his opinion when he's saying that I am right.That said, I agree that kids should be able to realistically assess their abilities – strengths and weaknesses too. But this is a separate issue. Ben is advocating that kids must justify themselves solely on what they do. They have no worth as a human being, merely as a contributor to GDP or somesuch. That you have to *earn* the right to respect yourself (probably by being born male and white).Do we coddle kids too much when we tell them that they are *special*? Who fucking cares. Lurning that in fact: -no, you can't get anything you want so long as you "try hard enough" -no, the good guys don't always win and teh bad guys don;t always get their comeuppance -no, LIFE ISN'T FAIRthose are things I don't want on FUCKING SESAME STREET. Jaded cynicism should wait until, at minimum, the legal drinking age.

  18. it is probably ALSO worthwhile to help that same child develop a healthy realistic understanding of both human and his or her individual limitations.I wonder if I know a person of any age who has a good sense of this.

  19. Is that some Socialist Canuckistani filth?Uh, yes. Yes it is.Bert and Ernie? "Big Bird"? "Snuffleupagus"?Actually, I'm going to stop kidding about this naow before someone invokes Rule 34 and I am driven to Google things that sane people were nevar meant to know.

  20. I've got half a jug of Heradura and some Mezcal that I don't know much about because the damn label is all in some foreign language.But your welcome to help yourself…

  21. It still has yet to BE spring here.If the weatherman is not lying again, tomorrow will be exactly the SECOND day over 70 degrees this YEAR.Also the second day in a row where it didn't rain. So very much to celebrate…W/V channels the wicked witch of some other dimension and asks about your little dog: retotoo

  22. Umm, I pretty much don't DO joyful. Joyful is a darvocet and a cup of coffee when the killings done and you discover almost as an afterthought that you're still alive.Joyful is a hot shower, where you try to wash off the guilt and horror and if the sound of the water is loud enough, nobody can hear your sobs.Joyful. Yeah. Reckon so…

  23. "Joyful is a hot shower, where you try to wash off the guilt and horror and if the sound of the water is loud enough, nobody can hear your sobs."You just lost yourself a job as motivational speaker at my next corporate retreat, my friend.

  24. You just lost yourself a job as motivational speaker at my next corporate retreat, my friend.I guess if your goal is comptetence and universal compliance with corporate governance, then yeah, I'd likely be a terrible choice.But, on the other hand, if your goal was to foment revolution and decimate the leadership cohort, I suspect you could do a great deal worse.Goals and outcomes, my dear slayer, goals and outcomes…

  25. Jaded cynicism should wait until, at minimum, the legal drinking age.I recognize that the kewl kids have moved on to the next new thing but I thought I'd point out that based on my own experience plus that of my kids, jaded cynicism sets in about the time kids enter high school.If they know what's good for 'em.

  26. Augh!!! Links to such songs should be a ban-able offense! But who cares? 96, baby!I know, I was just trying to sart some contraversy and liven up the thread. I promise I won't do it agaian, until the next time.

  27. For Slayer, the whole of Reign in Blood and South of Heaven are crucial. The first is messier and scarier and dumber and more consistent, the second has more precision and better sound quality but IMO less overall satisfaction.From the second:Silent Scream is about abortion from the fetus's point of view.Ghosts of War has the best beginning ever.Live Undead just rules.Seasons in the Abyss was kind of sucky because they started trying to play scales with their solos instead of just going bananas. Plus singing. War Ensemble's a lot of fun, but the chorus is "WAR ENSMBUULLLLLL!"Then Dave Lombardo left. He is a god. Slayer got a new drummer who was less crazy and had worse timing, and they went a little nu metal. Lombardo's back, but I haven't listened to the albums since his return.

  28. On the contrary, it's what you gotta know: it's all about horrible stuff and they are, in general, not smart. You can like Dethklök without reservations, but if you're 100% behind what Slayer do you've got problems.

  29. I should have been more gracious and thanked you for all the info and links. I guess I can try to ignore the idiocy of a song title that sounds like it's a propaganda film for Operation Rescue and just listen to those songs. Also, I try not to anger gods.

  30. Well, I'm glad that's your take on them, because when I read the lyrics to that first song, I was like "Oh." and I got all sulky. I'm actually looking forward to listening to the songs once I get a moment to myself.

  31. Well. I may not be in the right frame of mind to judge anything right now because from 11 to 7 am last night, I was "sleeping" at 45 minutes at a time…but I didn't really feel any of these songs. I find Dethklok's stuff much more melodic and interesting.

  32. At their best Slayer is not at all about melody, just about intimidation. Which is why they're their own parody, but it's also more of an athletic event than a form of music. They didn't know anything at all about what a melody was and when it came time to solo they picked fast and moved their fingers fast.Brendon Small, on the other hand, graduated from a music school.

  33. I've always assumed that there is no music too "hard" for me, groups like Slayer and Mastedon (also all the groups Genius recommends because of the Dethklok songs I've downloaded) may actually be too rough-edged for me. Dethklok, hard as they rock, still maintain a sort of elegance…at least to my ear.

  34. Well you're right: Small knows how to make melodies and harmonies. On his own he makes better two-guitar interplay than Slayer does with two real guitarists. That doesn't have much to do with what Slayer tries to do, which is string together notes that might sound scary and play them in the scariest possible way, with scary words. BOO!I like Slayer more, but it's certainly understandable if people think of them as amelodic, inept in their song structure, or just all around offensive and stupid.

  35. I'm not too easily offended…and I'm usually pretty uncomfortable dismissing groups as stupid, unless they're truly smarmy and terrible. But I'm comfortable saying their music probably is not for me.

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