Who the Hell is Billy Reuben?

THANKS SO MUCH for all the lovely well-wishes re: my last entry. You people are all right. Outta sight, even.

Getting him here was harrowing.


I was induced
Administered 2 different drugs, one of which gave me a panic attack
Had about 5 IV’s in me
At one point had 4 things shoved in my hoo-ha, one of which caused immense pressure on my nether regions. Never been so uncomfortable EVER.
Had two monitors strapped to me.
Experienced pain like I’ve never felt IN MY LIFE
The contractions were coming but nothing else was progressing. I cried because I just wanted something–anything to happen…besides pain.
His heart showed deceleration 3 times because the umbilical cord was tied twice around his neck.
The process started at 6 in the morning and ended at 10:50 that night. So that was almost 15 hours of unbelievable pain and actual heart-stopping worry.
The epidural I waited way too long to get also gave me a panic attack…because it feels so weird. In the end it was a life-saver, though.
3rd degree lacerations. When the Motrin is wearing off, it’s hard to walk.
I won’t mention the blood…all the blood. Oops, guess I just did.

 Sure makes me appreciate anti-choicers who view pregnancy as a minor inconvenience, though. Clearly, they get it.  Also, he had jaundice and he won’t latch and I am suffering from incredibly painful breast engorgement. But, hey, no biggie, right?

But it was all worth it.

I put my hand in the vid so you can see how tiny he is in comparison.


29 thoughts on “Who the Hell is Billy Reuben?

  1. Definitely congratulations then. Also to your medical team. I'm guessing that multiple hoo-ha incursion was related to the umbilical cord around the neck thing.Dudeskull will figure out teh breastfeeding. He's pretty active and alert looking in teh vid.And since we're sharing, Ultra Ninja was 7lb 8oz at birth – but had a rough first few days where she lost 9% of her body weight. She's bounced back with a vengance and is now closing in on 12 pounds. Babbies are incredibly resilient and I'm sure Dudeskull is going to be most excellent. He's got a great mom.

  2. Well, considering the net outcome was the incredible rarity of another human being on planet earth, I'm sure it was all worth it.I hope everything and everyone feels better soon.

  3. Billy Reuben was that boy who did ballet, wasn't he? I'm only sayin' that it's usually a short career and won't keep his parents in a style to which they could become accustomed. As we have explained to our children, on the putting greens at midnight, "We'll thank you for this, one day"Good to see you here DS. Get some of that weight offa your mom's chest.

  4. Definitely congratulations then. Also to your medical team. I'm guessing that multiple hoo-ha incursion was related to the umbilical cord around the neck thing.The labor and delivery team were pretty great. They really had their shit together. The mother/baby unit, notsomuch. I'm glad Ultra's doing well!!He's got a great mom.Aww, shucks. Thank you.

  5. Hmm, all sounds pretty familiar, event-wise. Good luck with the feeding stuff.Oh really? Well, I'm glad everything worked out for…the Little McGee…I'm assuming. Yeah, the feeding stuff is gonna be rough.I see what you do there. I figured of all my readers, you would probably be the one to catch that.

  6. You named him after a sandwich?Yes, but "Muffaletta" is such a pretty name. No regrets. I hope everything and everyone feels better soon.Thanks, mikey!He's a looker, just like his ma!Awwwwwww, thanks!

  7. RELEASE THE KRAKE– (COUGH, cough). Uh, well done! Now time to start warping little minds!!Actually, I'd like to use him as instrument to corrupt home-schooled kids and turn them into homo-sex-loving fetus-eaters. Don't tell anyone!

  8. missus Zombie went for the epi right away, but due to lack of urgency from the nursing staff, it got delayed for some time.The got the sense of urgency when she bit one of them.Kudos for coming through with your sensayuma intact.

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